In the movie Far From Heaven, four young housewives discuss their sex lives over lunchtime daiquiris. The boldest of the group coaxes the others to reveal how often their husbands want to make love. Can you imagine? The movie is set in the '50s and the clothing and interior decorating reflect the era, as does the girlish modesty of the confessions. Sex is presented as a wifely duty, an activity that, while not unpleasant, is engaged in because one's husband insists on it.
Sex-Starved Women: America's Best Kept Secret?
Sexual Cravings: Sex-Starved Wife - FamilyLife Canada
Psychology Today blogger Michelle Weiner Davis addresses what may be a growing epidemic. As someone who is in the front lines with couples, I have grown increasingly aware that women have no corner on the low libido market. In fact, based on my clinical observations and casual conversations with colleagues, I'd say that low desire in men is America's best kept secret. After all, in a culture where virility is inextricably connected with masculinity, why would any man want to broadcast his drop in desire? Most of the data available on the incidence of low libido in men is based on self-report and estimates vary widely. Do we really know what goes on behind bedroom doors?
Help for Sex-Starved Wives
Eight years ago, my marriage could've easily been classified as sex-starved. I was at the peak of my sexual shame and dysfunction at that time, when the sex I did have with my gentle, loving, and patient husband left my body feeling raw and my mind reeling with senseless, guilty thoughts— Sex is bad, I am bad, why am I so broken? It got so bad that one evening, through tears and a trembling voice, I gave my husband permission to have an affair to satisfy the sexual needs I was too broken to accommodate. It truly seemed like the only solution, one where we'd both be able to finally be ourselves without pressure or judgment. That wouldn't be the last time I made this suggestion to him and I was relieved every time that he declined my offer.
Many explain that everything started out well, but somewhere along the way, their husband lost interest in them sexually. Some say that their husband does not even touch them anymore, and wonder what is wrong with them. Have they become unattractive somehow? For an increasing number of women, the honeymoon is really over!